


Anxiety's Bad Habits

by Mattlovespace



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Anxiety Disorder, Bad at tagging, Nail Biting, Panic Attacks, bad habits
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-13
Updated: 2018-03-12
Packaged: 2019-02-14 12:07:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13007445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mattlovespace/pseuds/Mattlovespace
Summary: You always had really bad habits when it came to your anxiety and sure some habits we're worse then other's. Sometimes you wouldn't be able to stand still bouncing your legs or twiddling with your fingers. Other times you would bite your nails till they bleed or bite on your arm tearing off the skin and many other ways that would end up with you hurting yourself. You usually we're really good with dealing with it and if it got out of hand you'd take your medication but being trapped in apartment with a bomb and almost getting kidnapped by some psycho and having to plan out a charity party for some big organisation was making really hard for you. On top of that you had to deal with Seven a guy you fell for in a span of six days who was being a cold hearted jerk. His attitude towards you wasn't helping you at all but you still tried getting close to him even with your bad anxiety. How will this end? You had no idea.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys enjoy!

_'In and out Breathe In and Out'_   You were in the bathroom trying to calm yourself down from having a panic attack. You felt dizzy and sick to your stomach. _'One two three four five'_ You began the breathing exercises you had learned some time ago as a kid. Soon you felt yourself being able to breathe again but you didn't dare leave the bathroom, not after what happened. Seven had yelled at you for bouncing your leg to loudly yelling, "Why can't you let me work!" and "I just need some peace and quiet." You knew he had no right to yell at you for something like that but, he did just save you from almost getting kidnapped by his brother. You shivered at the memory. Hugging your knees and back pressed against the bathroom door you stare at the sink in front of you. Seven had never been like this in his phone calls or text messages, he was always so sweet, kind, and funny. So why was he being so cold? You took a deep breath and sighed.

  


 

  


"He's just stressed out, I mean who wouldn't be?" You began to stand up from the floor, and walk over to the sink. You look into the mirror and saw what you feared. You've been crying without even realizing it! Letting out a silent curse, you could feel yourself get mad. If you left the bathroom now Seven would surely know you've been crying. He was a secret agent after all. Well...you don't need to be a secret agent to know when someone's crying but that wasn't the problem right now. The problem was your eyes. Turning on the cold water while letting out another sigh, you began splashing your face with the cold water. As you did this, many thoughts started racing through your head. ' _What if you do it again and he yells at you. What if he hears me crying! What if what if-'_ You snapped out of it, your thoughts leaving as fast as they came. Turning to face the bathroom door, you blink. Did you hear wrong or did someone ju- Knock! There it was again! You weren't wrong there was knocking.

  


 

  


"I need to use the bathroom can you hurry up?" You blinked once more, as Seven's words sink in then you quickly threw more water onto your face. Hopefully this would work. Looking into the mirror one last time, you can see your eyes were still red and puffy but not as noticeable as before. You turned off the water before drying off your face. You open the door to the bathroom and walked pass Seven while facing the floor in the hopes he wouldn't notice your red eyes. He clearly didn't expect the door to open that fast because once you opened up he jumped back, but then entered the bathroom without even turning back. Entering the living room or well the only other room in the apartment beside the bathroom, this apartment was pretty small if you had to be honest, you sat down on the couch and opened up your phone to check if anyone was online. To your disappointment you had just missed Yoosung, so you decided to answer some emails.

  


 

You did this for a few minutes til' you noticed Seven walk back into the room. You could feel his gaze on you. You closed your eyes in hopes he wouldn't see how red they were, which to be honest were likely still red. You waited til' you heard him walk back to the corner he had claimed when he first showed up, and then slowly counted to ten before once again opening your eyes. He was hard at work once again on his laptop coding away on what was likely the security system algorithm . He was leaning forward a bit so he could get a better look at his computer screen. You knew he wasn't comfortable at all, but you also knew he made it very clear about leaving that corner, so you let him be despise the guilt you felt every time he cracked his back. Checking the time on your phone, you saw that it was about to be noon and you still haven't eaten anything. You were also sure as hell that Seven hadn't eaten anything as well. He had told you that he only lived off those chips of his during your many text messages and phone calls. Standing up you walked over to the part of the apartment that was consider the kitchen. You made sure not to disturb Seven this time, in fear that he might yell at you again. Making it to the kitchen successfully, you are full of pride, yes it's stupid you know, but you couldn't help but celebrate something as small as this so you did a little silly dance which almost caused you to slip. Thankfully you caught yourself in time and Seven had on his headphones so he didn't hear any of it. "Ok I should quit while I'm ahead." You said to yourself now that you knew Seven couldn't hear you that well.

  


 

  


You open the fridge to see with what you had to work with. Your no chef, but there had to be something you could make for the both of you. Looking through the fridge, you couldn't have been more wrong. The only things in there were the Dr.Pepper Seven had brought with him and a few cans of food you had bought from the store before the whole kidnapping incident happened today. ' _Dam it'_ You thought, ' _Looks like I'll have to go out to buy some items so I can make us something to eat but…'_ You turn to look at Seven who was still typing away on his computer, ' _Should i tell him I'm going out?'_ You suddenly were once again full of anxiety. What if he yelled at you again. He seems to be really focused on his work right now. You thought it over while your fingernails found your mouth. You soon started biting on them tearing off the skin and nails out of habit. When you finally thought it over, you took a deep breath and called out to Seven while you still bit away your nails. You waited but you got no answer and you could feel your anxiety grow within you _. 'Should I call him again? No, what if he did hear me and just ignored me.. dam it'_ Staring at Seven's back, you tried calling out again but you felt your voice get caught in your throat. You couldn't bring yourself to call out to him again. You just decided to just go without telling him. I mean if he didn't want you leaving he would have said so, and if he did ask why you left you'd tell him he didn't answer. So really, it was his fault for not answering. Nodding to yourself, you headed for the door having your purse in hand and phone in the other. You open the door and walked out. As you closed the door, you started walking towards the elevator and clicked the button. As you waited you decided to answer some emails.

 

**_Ding_ ,**

  


  


While still on your phone replying to the party guess, you walked in and turned around to face the doors that were now closing. You locked your phone as you decided on how to respond back, the elevator doors were just about to close when suddenly a hand shoots through just in time to have them open again. You blinked two times and looked up to come face with face with Seven who looked relieved to have caught you in time, "What are you doing?!" he sounded irritated, which only caused you to put your hands back into your mouth.

  


  


  


"I-I'm um... Going to the store" He blinked as if he didn't hear you correctly.

  


 

"The store? Are you an idiot or something, do you know how dangerous it is to leave the apartment, considering our situation! Someone could be outside waiting to kidnap you!" He grabbed you by your wrist, the hand that you were biting, and pulled it away. "And stop biting your nails you're hurting yourself." You felt your face grow red. This was the first time he had showed any concern for you. Before you could answer back though, you heard the elevator doors closing again behind Seven, who cussed under his breath. He turned around to press the button back up to Rika's apartment and then spoke again without letting go of your wrist. "Why did you need to go to the store anyways?" Trying to play it cool so he wouldn't notice you blushing, you cleared your throat.

 

"I was going to go buy some food for us there's nothing in the fridge an-" he interrupted you by pulling on your wrist so you could face him correctly.

  


 

"I told you not to worry about me!! And if you wanted something to eat you should have told me I would have called some place for takeout!!"

  


 

  


"B-but i did, y-you didn't answer me!" You struggled to stay still, afraid he might raise his voice even more. Seven didn't answer he just kept eye contact with you and you swear you could see his cheeks start to turn a shade of red.  The doors to the elevator opened and he turned around,  pulling you out with him, by the same wrist he had been holding on to. As you were being dragged back into the apartment you started to fear what Seven would have to say. ' _God what if he yells again? I shouldn't have left, stupid STUPID!'_ You were so caught up in your own thoughts that you didn't even realize that you had started biting your nails with your free hand. The only reason you had noticed was from the slight pain you felt from biting too deep into your skin. Pulling them away, you saw that two of them were now bleeding, while the remaining fingers were full of teared flesh. While you were dealing with that, Seven had come to a stop in front of the door to Rika's apartment. He let go of your wrist and started punching in the code to the door. You started twirling with your finger in hopes that your urge of biting your nails would go away, but thinking about it only made it much worse. Concentrate on something, come on, come on. You started to look around for literally anything else to focus on. Soon your sight was set on Seven's back and for a split second the thought of hugging him for comfort your mind. Stepping closer you waited until he opened the door so you could dash into the bathroom to take some of your medication. You weren't quite sure if Seven knew how bad your anxiety was. He had told you when you first joined RFA about the background check he did on you, but what he specifically checked about you was a mystery.

  


 

  


The door to Rika's apartment finally opened and you tried to dash in so you could enter only to bump into Seven, who was trying to do the same. You caused him to hit the door and almost fell over. "I-I'm sorry! I thought you'd w-want me to go in first." You picked at your finger nails from behind your back, "I'll get out of your hair now, I'm a distraction I know." You dash into the bathroom before he could answer. Opening the mirror cabinet, you started looking for your medications. ' _Idiot ,watch were you're going! Damm it! I keep getting in his way! He hates me, I mean who wouldn't hate a ball of anxiety! Ha god... I'm stupid._ _'_ After a few minutes you finally find the meds and you twist the lid off with shaky hands wait... When did you start shaking? God you really hope you haven't been shaking this whole time, you already felt bad enough. You manage to successfully twist off the lid, only to be punched in the gut with more anxiety, "Of fucken course I only have one left." Now what? Yeah sure, if you took the pill now you would be able to calm down. Most likely you would pass out and wake up in the middle of the night, not that it really mattered to you. The real issue here was later. What if later you panic to the point where you couldn't clam down, what if you get yelled at again and freak out on Seven. "Of course.." you put the last pill back into the capsule and closed it tightly. "I'll save it for later I just.. need to relax! I've done it before, come on, breath in and out." Beginning the breathing exercises from before, you tried to focus on nothing, but the only problem was your thoughts, which were focused on everything, which was irritating you to the point where you wanted to scream and cry like a child who didn't get what they wanted. The tap to the sink was dripping and you swear it got louder by the minute. The light to the room started to look brighter which give you a headache, and the urge to bite down on your nails was out of control.

 

'I have to get out of here' You thought. And with that, you stumbled into the hallway of the apartment. You were feeling a bit better, but not enough to face Seven. You sat down by the edge of the wall, which was out of Seven's view. The room was getting dizzy and you wanted to puke. Eventually, you gave in to your urge of nail biting and started to destroy your fingernails. It was painful yes but it made you feel in control of something so you kept at it. You were sure some of your fingers were bleeding by now. You tried again to focus on something to get your thoughts organized so you wouldn't think about everything at once. Then the sound of loud typing started to fill your ears, this caused you to release the breath you had been holding in. The sound of Seven typing away at his laptop was now all you could hear and focus on. In a way it was helping you relax so you decided to keep at it. You aren't quite sure when you started to feel better but before you knew it the panic attack, you had felt coming earlier, was gone. Sure you were still distorting your nails, but hey, beggars' can be choosers. Shifting you attention towards the fingers that were currently in pain, you pulled back one hand to see how bloody your fingers were. The nails on your fingers were so short that you could see the skin under it that clearly no one should see, and the skin around the finger nails were bleeding form you going in to deep. You whimpered as you tear a long chunk of skin off your middle finger with the hand that was currently still in your mouth. _'Stop! stop it! Ouch, come on focus on the typing again'_ you tried focusing again but that's when you suddenly realized the typing had come to an end, then you felt a pair of hands on your shoulders. Turning, you realized Seven was crouched right beside you with a look of horror on his face. He clearly had been there for a while.

  


  


"Oh god. Hey! Hey, stop that!" He pulled your hands away, "Shit how long have you been doing this? You're bleeding so much. God there's not much skin left on this one." He was talking more to himself then to you. "Hold on let me go get some bandages." He walked into the bathroom while your hands went straight back into your mouth. You whimpered in pain, and not a few seconds after you could feel blood rolling down your arms. _'fuck to deep'_ "Ok I go- HEY STOP!" Seven stumbled forwarded once more pulling your arms away, "Dam it you bit deeper." He examined your fingers carefully, "It's bleeding even worse now." He makes eye contact, "Why are you doing this?" Avoiding his eyes and flustered by how close he is you answer.

  


 

  


"I-It's a habit I have... I just have nerves and well ah..you can see how that ends."  He started working on your left hand bandaging your fingers carefully as not to hurt you.

  


 

  


"Doesn't it hurt?" he questions as he continued working.

  


"W-Well yes... but it's a habit. It's not easy to just stop." You watched as he worked on your fingers. _'Looks like he's done this before'_ you thought before you flinched in pain.

  


 

"Ah sorry." you warmly smiled down at him, unsure if he was aware you did and continue speaking. "It's like that habit of yours, pulling your hair when your coding and make a mistake." Seven's movements freezes and his amber eyes snap at you, suddenly you feel your face grow red. _'Did I just say that?'_ _He's going to know you stare at him now!_ You panic a little and again out of habit started to bring your right hand up to your mouth, he seems to notice and grasped your wrist before you could bite down again.

  


 

"I said stop that!" You then felt him start working on your left arm again. You mumbled an apology and turn away letting him finish his work. You felt your face red and feared that Seven might hear your heartbeat from how loud and fast it was. This was the first time Seven was so close to you and not only that he was holding your hand and being sweet just like your many phone calls. The Seven you fell for was still in there and he did care he was just hiding it. You smiled to yourself _'I knew it, I wasn't just imaging it, he does care.'_ Seven then dropped your left hand and started to work on your right, which was in much worse condition than your left. You tend to favor the right more than the left. He sighed then spoke, "Promise me you won't do this to yourself again." Blinking you turn to him again, not knowing how to answer him. Yes, you could promise him you wouldn't do this again, but you knew better. You couldn't keep that promise and you don't make promises you can't keep. You must have spaced out a little because all of a sudden, you felt Seven tighten his grip. His face full of worry and was that.. gilt?

  


  


"Ok... I promise." He smiled a little, which caused you to blush even more. He seemed to notice and started to blush as well. The both of you stayed like that for a while just looking at each other. Seven was still holding onto you but you didn't mind it, being near him calmed you and you had long forgotten your panic attack from moments ago. You wish time could stop. You wanted to be like this forever, near Seven. Relaxed and forgetting all your problems, but soon he let go of your hand and stood up which caused you to let out a frustrated sigh. Already missing his presence, you keep your eyes on him sure that he would walk back to his corner but to your surprise he just stood there staring at you. He seemed to be in deep thought and you wondered what he could possibly be thinking so hard about. Suddenly he nodded to himself, as if he just made up his mind.

 

"Come with me." He blurted out.

  


"Huh?" you were taken back by that. What did he mean 'Come with me' Ever since he got here, it was always, "Stay away." or "Leave me alone." Not "Come with me." Before you could even answer, he once more took you by the wrist and pulled you into the living room. "H-Hey what are you doing?" He didn't answer, he just walked over to his little corner and made you sit down on the floor with him. Flustered and confused, you looked at him as if his face had the answer.

  


He seemed to notice this and said, "This way I can see if you try anything with your fingernails again." You felt yourself grow red again as you looked at him shocked. Normally he would want you far away from him, well not that far maybe just a few feet away, and now here he was telling you to stay right beside him. "J-Just don't interrupt me and stop looking at me like that!" His cheeks were now a shade of red that kind of resembled his hair, you couldn't help but giggle. This only caused his problem to get worse.

  


  
"Okay I'll try." And with that he pulled up his headphones and started up his work once more. Your back was against the wall, eyes close you listened closely as Seven who would type away. It was like a lullaby really, fingers always repeating the same sound occasionally they would stop or go out of beat, which you could only assume was him making a mistake. You don't remember when it happen really, but you soon fell asleep to the sound of Seven typing away. With a small smile, you knew that deep down he did care and you weren't going to give up on him, even if you did have bad anxiety you were going to try to get through to him no matter what!  


 


	2. Punishments

You jumped in a cold sweat heart racing. You were still half asleep and looking around you let your eyes adjust to the dark _'what time is it?'_ you wondered as you searched around for your photo.

As you hands searched around for your phone in you half-sleep daze you suddenly realize how warm and comfortable you are. It was then when you realize that you had a blanket around you.

"Seven..." you smiled holding tightly onto the blanket, he must have put it over you when you fell asleep wait... you looked around _'where is Seven?'_ That's when you hit you there wasn't any tapping and the apartment was completely dark for once, no light coming from a computer screen.

You stood up as you gave up on the search for your phone, standing there in the dark you started to fear that Seven had finish is work and left. _'He wouldn't..'_ but your doubts got the better of you and your half asleep mind started to play tricks on you and suddenly you swear you could see a figure standing in front of you staring straight at you.

You then started to pull on your hair, scared for your life, wrapping the blanket tightly around your body with your free hand you took a step backward, eyes scanning the room for any signs of the figure which was now gone from where you had first seen it.

_'I'm_ _going to die_ _'_ At this point, you abandon the blanket hands busy with one pulling on your hair while the other scratched your skin.

You were really scared, where was Seven? Did he leave? ' _No no no!'_ you were shaking now, tears wanting to fall from your eyes. The hand that had been pulling your hair had now joined the other with scratching yourself not out of itching but for punishing reasons _. 'I shouldn't have fallen asleep!_ _He left!_ _No no! Don't cry!'_ then you started to hit yourself _'STOP CRYING YOU BABY'_ you then punched yourself as you grinded your teeth as anger filled you from being so scared and weak.

Anger slowly taking you over you kept punishing yourself, if it wasn't scratching yourself till your skin hurt then it be a punch or slapping and on rare occasions you'd pull your hair.

This went on for a bit until you suddenly heard a door open and without releasing it you dropped to your knees covering yourself with your hands and yelled in fear "PLEASE DON'T TAKE ME! I DON'T WANT TO DIE" Your body was shaking even more, then you heard footsteps walking towards you and at this point, your flight or flight instincts kicked in and you stumbled backward till your back touched the wall. Feeling arms take a hold of your shoulders you flail your arms hitting whatever was touching you.

"Hey hey! Snap out of it! It's me Seven! Your still asleep wake-up!" Snapping your eyes open you find Seven kneeling in front of you without his glasses, they must have fallen from you flailing your arms at him, you then realize your breathing was pretty fast and a few tear rolling down your cheeks as your body was still shaking.

"Breath, breath here follow me" Seven then started to breathe slowly lifting and lowing his hand to set the phase, then when he saw you claimed down he spoke

"You were half asleep... I guess something scared you. Are you ok now?" nodding you then take note of a red mark on his face

"I-Im sorry!" picking up his glasses you put them back on which ended up with you pocking one of his eyes "I didn't mean to hit you ugh... I can't do anything right" you thanked the sky it was dark because you were sure you were blush like a madman. He only laughed "It's ok its ok im fine"  rubbing his eye he then uses a finger to fix his glasses.

You weren't sure if you were dreaming or not anymore because Seven had never laughed around you and if you were even a little bit closer to him he'd tell you to back off. As you tired to clam your shaking you felt him move to your side and then a sudden light started to shine.

It takes your eyes a bit to get used to the sudden bright light but when they do finally adjust you could see him typing away on his computer only this time he wasn't coding he was doing but something else

"you know..." his started suddenly voice sounding so tired when was the last time he fell asleep?

"When I need to calm down I listen to music or the sound of rain and wind" was he trying to help you calm down? _'_ _Maybe I can get_ _through to him'_ you thought "Y-You do?" you tried to steady your voice but failed poorly "S-so the mighty god Seven also panics heh... who would have thought" glancing up at him you hoped he'd play along with you but he doesn't he only continues

"Yah...just here" then he slides his orange headphones over your ears and the sound of a rainstorm fills your ears.

"This should help with the nerves and..." he went quiet for a moment "a-and I'll stay right here till you fall asleep so... It's going to be fine. Ok?"

You suddenly wish the light of his computer was brighter because you swear you saw him blush but then again maybe you wanted to see that so badly your mind tricked you into seeing it and from the trick your mind just did a while ago it was possible. Smiling at him you nod and close your eyes letting your body relax as you faintly hear him start typing away once more.

Letting the sound of a rainstorm fill your ears and mind completely you let yourself start drifting off to sleep once again, you head bobbing back up when it drifted down, when suddenly you got an idea maybe it was from how tired you were or just a sudden burst of bravery but you wanted to try a daring move on Seven.

Your plan is simply to pretend to be asleep and let your head fall on his shoulder that was just a few inches away from you. He wouldn't know he'd just think you fell asleep and if he didn't want you there he would just wake you and you'd pretend to wake up and move away.

You debated with yourself for a few minutes then finally after you agreed with the plan in hand you waited a minute then slowly started to drop your head to the side in hopes it would reach his shoulder. You must have miss understood how far his shoulder was because once you left your head fall completely you came crashing down onto his lap. Embarrassed by this but coming too far to go back you wait for him to react, you took this chance to feel his warmth, his smell, his presences.

A few minutes pass and he still hasn't tired waking you _'_ _maybe he doesn't want to wake me up in fear that ill panic again? But still..._ _'_ but you soon threw that thought out the window when you suddenly felt something go through your hair _,_ _'did he just!!'_ then you felt it again but this time it lingered longer than before he was stroking your hair to the side!

You don't know how to react to this but you still pretend to be asleep as you could feel your face slowly glow red. After a few strokes, you felt his hand shift back to the laptop in front of you and you lied there confused but happy. _'ugh don't smile don't_ ** _smile!_** _'_ fighting back the big smile that threatens to come out you concentrated on the rainstorms in your ears the wind was so calming and before you know it you've drifted back to sleep with Seven once again stoking your hair. He was careful for the feared you might wake up, he had no idea you had just gone back to sleep.

Seven had no idea why he was allowing himself to be so caring for you tonight maybe it was the fact that he was so tired or maybe the fact that he's been in your place before, being half asleep scared to death at something that wasn't even real or It could be that he was always very emotional when the moon was high, but whatever it was he hated himself for showing you this side of him and he let out a frustrated sigh.

_'I'll have to push her away again, even more than before,_ _pro_ _bably_ _make her cry again.."_ he then sighed angrily for he knew you'd been crying in the bathroom he wasn't an idiot, he had studied human behavior after all so he knew when something was wrong. It hurt him it really did he wanted nothing but to hug you tightly and never let go, he wants to say sorry and kiss you all over until the end of time but he couldn't not unless he wanted to put you into danger.

As he stroked your hair to one side he couldn't help but wonder if you would ever do something like this to him, he then starts to imagine having his head on your lap as you slowly stroke your hand through his hair it made him kind of tired just think about it.

Shaking his head so he could come back to reality he takes his hand away and starts typing away on the laptop, he needed to finish his work but having you asleep in his lap was making it difficult for him.

He tried thing about something else and eventually a few minutes pass and he is settled back into his work tapping away completely forgetting about you and he would for longer if you weren't for you rolling over and hugged his waist closer rubbing your face closer. "S-Shit" there was no way he could finish is work now... god you were impossible but he couldn't help but smile at your cute sleeping face. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!!! I'm sorry i look so long to update I went out of state for a week and school started back up and project after project has been hitting that i didn't have time to edit my work so I apologize if i made mistakes on the spell or anything else! I do want to say THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THE FEED BACK! I honestly didn't know people would read this ahh im happy! Anyways updates will come faster then this one promise! Anyways leave a comment for ideas!


	3. Next Morning

As you slowly started to come out of your dreaming state you felt how suddenly warm and comfortable you were  _ 'I'm so warm... what the heck am I hugging?' _

You hugged the mysterious item in question closer and took a deep breath ' _This smells...so sweet?'_

Slowly and lazily you open your eyes to find yourself cuddling Seven's jacket close and a few feet away was a sleeping Seven. His arms were crossed, probably from being cold or falling asleep while in thought, his glasses were crooked as he drooled a little.

You couldn't help but smile at the sight of him but began to wonder _'_ _How did I end up off his lap and…’_ you look at his jacket which you still were cuddling close  _ 'Why and how am I cuddling his jacket? N-Not that I mind it anyways...'  _

Sitting up careful not to wake Seven up, according to him he never sleeps so better to let him rest when he especially after yesterday incident. Rubbing your face and eyes while stretching a bit you recall what happened last night and feel embarrassed right away  _ 'Wow thanks for making me look like a fool last night brain of mine' _ shaking away the embarrassment you suddenly feel your arms sting and looking down you could see long red scratch marks all over your forearms.

_ 'That's....’ _ Raising your arms to your face you look at the damage you caused yourself last night long scratch marks ran down your arms and some places even cut open or other places you had just torn the skin. 

You clicked your tongue in annoyance  _ 'I need to hide this before Seven wakes up' _ you looked over at him from in between your arms _  'not that it matters... doesn't look like he'll wake up anytime soon but still... Just to be sure' _

Slowly and carefully you stand up with Seven's jacket around you, hopefully, these wooden floors don't creek, sneaking pass Seven's sleeping body you reach the bathroom without waking him. You fist pump the air and do a small dance  _ 'Good job me! Now..' _ you look back down at your arms and let out a frustrated sigh  _ 'Time to patch up' _

Searching around the caveat you find a role a half use bandages, probably the one Seven used on you for your fingers, there was just enough for your arms but only just. You knew you'd have to go out and buy more soon but you had no idea if you'll be able to convince Seven. 

Shaking your head you push those thoughts aside, for now, right now you had to cover up your arms. Taking off the jacket you start with your left arm first wrapping around it slowly making sure to cover up all the broken skin and scratch marks 

_ 'Note to self-try going for my legs next time'.  _ As you finish with your left arm and moved on to the right you heard some movement coming from the other room 

"Seven must be up" you mumbled as you started wrapping a little faster getting a hang of it now. You hummed a small tone and then suddenly heard footsteps heading to the bathroom and with no time to react you covered yourself with the closest thing near you, which happen to be Seven's jacket you dragged into the bathroom with you.

Back facing the door you hear Seven enter the bathroom but he doesn't speak confused by the silence you turn to face him. He's was looking at you face tomato red, you notice he still didn't have his glasses on so he was squinting a little to see you better and he still has messy bed head which you found really cute, he then suddenly clears his throat

"I just... I just woke up and well didn't see you anywhere sorry... Just S-sorry if I interned anything...also..." he couldn't look at you straight in the eyes anymore "T-Take off my jacket when your d-done" and with that, he rushes out of the bathroom. 

Grinning a little you finish wrapping up your arm, slipping the leftover bandage into Seven's jacket, you walk out of the bathroom with your arm's neatly behind your back, slowly you walk into the kitchen to look for something to eat for both you and Seven, he seemed to be in a good mood so maybe he wouldn't yell this time. 

Taking out bread you make both you and Seven a sandwich three for him and one for you, he hasn't eaten much since he got here only drinking those stupid sodas of his.  _ 'Maybe I should hide them until he eats and drinks something healthy..’ _  you turn to make sure he wasn't looking your way  _ 'it's for his own good anyways... I worry about him' _

 Slowly but surely you walk over to the fridge and quietly open it, not much was in it since you were stopped from going to buy more food yesterday, finding the Dr peppers you slowly pull out the pack and placed it on the floor. Making sure Seven was to busy to notice you hurry over to the closet and hide the pack of sodas under a pile of clothes. 

"Hopefully he won't find them here" standing up you head back to the kitchen making sure not to look too suspicious from your soda hiding mission. Now that those evil drinks were out of the way you grab a cup and fill it with tap water since you ran out of any other water and weren't allowed out to buy more, and slowly walked over to Seven. 

He was hard at work with his code or program or whatever it was hackers use and so he didn't bother to look your direction or even glance at you when you stood over him. 

"What is it?" 

His cold words causing chills to run down your spine

"I um..I made you two sandwiches... I know it's not much but you need to eat you've been working since yesterday and I'm sure you'll be working all day today as well” 

Squatting down you place the plate down and slide it his way  _ 'please just take’ _ you begged  _ 'I really don't have the energy to fight you on this’. _ You stayed squatting down next to him while looking at the plate of food you had given him  ' _Just take it’_ Without even looking your way he slides the plate back your way 

“I'm not hungry leave me alone”

_ 'Of course’ _ sighing and letting your knees touch the floor you pick the plate back up and waddle over to him on your knees. This finally caught his full attention because he jumped back a bit 

“What are you doing?” 

You place the plate onto to his keyboard harder than you extended to 

“Just… JUST eat these sandwiches, you stubborn baby” 

Staring straight into his eyes you notice the surprised expression on his face and to be completely honest you didn't expect yourself to do that as well. As you both studied each other's faces you noticed how Seven golden eyes had huge dull bag underneath both eyes but that didn't stop you from staring and getting lost in those pools of gold. 

They had some kind of effect on you the kind of effect that when you looked into them you couldn't look away you know the kind of effect Zen probably had on when women saw him out in public. You could look into his eyes for ages if he allowed it but right now wasn't the time for that. 

Snapping back from your thoughts you noticed how close you and Seven had leaned onto each other. It finally hit you that Seven was still lost in thought studying your face. You watched as his golden eyes went side to side scanning your face from behind those glasses of his but it wasn't until they landed onto your eyes that your face flushed. It took him a few more minutes to release how close the both of you were and jerked away. 

“If I have to feed you…”  You added 

“I'll umm.. I'll do it! Don't think I won't so just eat these stupid sandwiches Luciel!” 

“I'm working so back off” 

His face was expressionless but something about his eyes was hinting otherwise so with this random burst of boldness you grabbed one of the sandwiches and shoved it into his mouth

_ 'W _ _ hat the hell I'm I doing oh  _ **_GOD_ ** _ WHAT IS HAPPENING’  _ despise the embarrassed and blushing face you were feeling you keep your ground. Seven must have thought you were bluffing because it took him a full two minutes to even processed what you had done and another full three to react.

“H-HEY!!”

He grabs your wrist pushing it away “Stop that I'll eat ok..I'll eat! Just.. just back off” 

Nodding you place the sandwiches on his lap and walk off to the bathroom so you could shower and fully start the day. As you turn the corner you notice Seven eyeing you as he even swallowed slowly the reminding of his sandwich.

_ 'Is he...is he checking me out? What?!? No no, I'm... I'm Flippin crazy yeah haha crazy nope’   _ rushing into the bathroom you close the door and turn on the water “What did I do…. **OH GOD** ” 

Today was gonna be one heck of a  long day but hey at least you got him to eat something that's a start right? ‘I‘m _ not gonna be able to look at his eyes anymore ughhh’  _

As you waited for the water to grow warmer you started to peel off the badges Seven had placed onto your fingers for they were all bloody but you decided to keep the ones around your wrist on because you did  _ just  _ put them on.

As the room started to fog up from the heat of the water you took a look at your fingers they were a wreck but they would be more of a wreck if it wasn't for Seven and his quick thinking. You smiled and made a mental note to thank him for last night and the day before. Carefully taking off Sevens jacket and your clothes you stepped into the shower and let the stress of yesterday watch away down the drain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I originally was gonna post another chapter last week but I have writes block FOR TWO WEEKS!! It was hell because I know how much Y'all love this story last night around 4 am I was hit with inspiration so pardon the errors if you see any! Now that I have my writers juice back ill be off and hopefully post next week! I'm gonna try and update ever week ok!


	4. My Jacket

“Oh god… what the hell did I do!” Closing his eyes and bring up his hands to cover his face Seven let out a deep and loud frustrating sigh. His face was still burning up from seeing you in his jacket. He knew he had gotten it oversized HECK it was pretty big on him but seeing you in it  _ god _ ...he couldn't help but stare.

Your messy bed hair, the way you shyly stood around him, and the blush **_god_** the blush on your cheeks when you noticed him staring nearly killed him wait… staring _?!_

_ ‘DAMMIT LUICEL YOU IDIOT! Why!  _ **_WHY_ ** _ did I have to look in the first place! Well I mean...I couldn't help it but she was so..ugh… my head feels overheated I need some Dr pepper’  _

Closing his laptop Seven stood up which caused all his limbs to crack from the pose he had been in since yesterday.

“Ugh, my back is killing me” stopping in front of the figure Seven took this opportunity to stretch and correctly crack his back. He moved his neck side to side his back as well and also bend down to touch his toes just for the heck of it. 

“Ahhh that feels so much better!” Quickly he opens the fridge door

“Where is my lovely dear old friend I call Dr pepper” searching the fridge, even though there wasn't much to look through maybe he should have gone with you to the store, Seven couldn't seem to find his favorite drink 

“Huh? That's weird I know I had at least four left” scratching his head he closed the fridge door and began to search the cabinets opening each one by one leaving them all open until there wasn't any more to open. 

“Damn it I know I had some left! The only other person here who could have done anything to them is…” Turning his head a little Seven eyes the bathroom door “is well...her but she..she wouldn't...would she?” 

Giving up the search Seven decides to just get a glass of water sure it wouldn't taste the same or give him the boost of energy he needed but it was better than nothing and besides how long has it been since he last had a cold glasses of water.

_'Too long if you ask me’_ Leaning his back against the counter Seven took a long deserved gulp of water, he could feel the cold sensation of the water travel down his throat and it sent a wave of relaxation through his body.

Once done he let out a content sigh and put his empty glass in the sink, his mind couldn't help but picture you in his jacket once more the way your hands peeked through the sleeves of his jacket or the way it perfectly captured your curve and came to a stop right by your thighs oh what he would give to feel you pressed up against him from a hug to feel your warmth near him.

“S-shit…Luicel snaps out of it” turning on the cold sink water he starts to splash himself in the face.

“There's no time for these pervaded thoughts Saeran still out there hacking doing dirty jobs that should have been mine to deal with! Ugh, I need to call V again” 

Taking out his phone and turning off the water with his other hand Seven starts to dial V number, his experience fingers already knowing where to type. Once his phone begins to dial he proceeds to walk back to his corner, thoughts of you in his jacket still crossed his mind to the point where he walked into something .

Shaking his head be snaps out of his and comes face to face with a wet-haired you, it took him a minute to realize you were still in his jacket and it took him a whole other two to figure out you ONLY had on his jacket. 

His face was now scarlet red and instinctively turned his head to the side out of embarrassment and privacy 

“W-what are you?! Oh god… Just... JUST my jacket oh god...p-put something ON!!"

“I-I I LEFT THE TOWEL A-AND AND MY CLOTHES GOT WET AND I TRY CALLING YOU BUT YOU DIDN'T ANSWER AND...AND **HEY** **LOOK AWAY**!!!!” 

Snapping back to reality Seven found himself staring straight at you his mouth hanging open a bit 

“S-Shit Just I'm...IM GOING OUT INTO THE HALLWAY!”

Avoiding getting any closer to you Seven hurrys out of the apartment face still full of embarrassment. He uses his left hand to rub his face while the other goes through his ginger red hair he was already having a hard time trying to get the picture of you in jacket out of his mind now he had to deal with  _ this _

“Shit this girl...she's….  **impossible** .”

Letting out a frustrated sigh he tries to calm down but has a feeling today was gonna be a  _ long _ day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Yes I know this is a short chapter the reason being is I wanted to see if you guys wanted Seven's point of view in this story! I have a few headcanons on how he might deals with his anxiety so let me know I'll be updating a full chapter in maybe 4 days at the most 5. Also I wanted to thank everyone for their lovely comments they keep me motivated THANKS HANKS THANKS! If you enjoy this story check out my other story "I'm Addicted" because things are about to get good there. Ok I'm off have a lovely day


	5. Bathroom Troubles

As the warm water ran down your back you started to let your mind wander just who really was Seven? Why didn't he mention he had a twin brother and why of all places did he turn out to be the hacker who tricked you into coming into Rika’s apartment. 

“It just doesn't make sense…” bring you head up you closed your eyes and let the warm water hit your face  _'Seven_   _seemed surprised when he first showed up and...Saeran said something about abandoning him.’_

Grabbing the shampoo you start to rub it all over your hair letting you thoughts wonder for a bit more. After you finish you decide to stay in the shower for a bit longer so you sat down and let the water hit the top of your head as you hugged your knees close. Your mind then shifts to the RFA a bunch of strangers who have been nothing but kind souls to you. Sure Jaehee still didn't fully trust you and Jumin could be a jerk sometimes or Zen would complain about his looks and how he was so lonely and lastly Yoosung a loner gamer who was clearly depressed about the loss of his cousin. 

Even with their faults you love each and every one of them sure you just got to know them and you have a long way to go to become close friends like they all are with each other but if this party went well and the hacker problem goes away you would be able to meet the others and you'll see where it goes from there. 

Closing your eyes you let the water from the shower head fall for a bit more enjoying the feeling it gave onto of your head until you decided to head out. Turning off the water you careful step out and notice the wet mess you made and the pile of wet clothes that once belonged to you.

‘Oops...ok note _to self-fully close the shower curtain or check that it's completely closed before turning on the water’_

Picking up your once dry clothes you place them into a basket you put in the bathroom when you first got to the apartment, grabbing the brush you sit on the edge of the bath and start brushing your wet hair. As you bring the brush down your hair you let out a frustrating growl already knowing what to expect.

'Please _  just have a tiny bit fall out this time!' _  slowly removing the brush you begin to pull out the loose hairs from it with a disappointed look on your face.

“Damn it…this is more than usual ugh…” Full of rage you throw the brush across the bathroom and stand up hugging yourself.

“All of this stress is getting to me...I need to do something about it but..” you pauses as if the sudden silence had the answers you we're looking for.

“But...he won't listen” Blowing a raspberry you shiver from the cold now cold air in the bathroom  _ 'Let's worry about that later right now I need to cover myself up now…’  _ looking around you begin to look for a towel  _ 'Where is that towel? Shouldn't they be under the bathroom sink?’  _ crouching down you find the cabinet empty and you freeze.

_ 'No….no no no! oh god NO!’  _ Standing up you pace around the bathroom panicking how could you forget to bring in a towel with you?! Facepalming you start of a way to get out of here.

“I can't just walk out Seven would 100% see me!” Walking over to the door you slowly crack it open enough so you and peek through it and there oh the couch lie your clothes waiting to worn.

“Ugh...Maybe I could call him over? No, he wouldn't hear me if I recall correctly he still had on his headphones when I came in here.” Closing the door you let your bear back slide down the cold bathroom door until you bear butt meets the floor.

_ 'Come on think! I can't call out to him because he won't hear you so maybe..”  _ You scan the bathroom until your eyes land on your phone.

“I _  could call him by phone!!”   _ Standing up you rush over to the bathroom sink and grab your phone you open the RFA app and hovering over Seven number.  _ 'I'm I really gonna do this?’  _ you shiver from the cold as you start to second guess yourself ' _ I mean what I'm I gonna say? Yah hello Seven? Sorry to bother you and everything but I just have to tell you I forgot the towel could you come over to the bathroom where I'm butt naked and hand it to me! Oh and while your add it come and give me a kiss! But don't forget to tell me how dangerous you are after it ok? Thanks you're a sweetheart.’ _

You begin to grow restless and anxious from all the standing around but mostly cold..really cold actually.  _ 'Ugh screw it!’ _ pressing the green call button you bring the phone up to your ear as it rings.  _ 'Come on come on! Pick up already!’ _

“Hello this is 707 defender of justice! I can't come to the phone right now because I'm slaving away behind a screen! Ugh...I'm tired..i’ll make sure to call you later but it could take a while for I am just a poor salve hacking away for the higher-ups.”

Clicking you feel a sense of relief but also a huge sense of dread now what were you gonna do? You decide to call again but you are greeted with the same voice mail and an even bigger of anxiety.

_ ‘Damn it! Now what! I mean I could stay in here until he begins to wonder what I’m up to but I who knows how long that takes when it comes to him and his work, from what I've seen for the last day anyways, he gets to focus in his work and it could be hours until he comes and find me pIus don't want him to come find me naked in here that would be too embarrassing for me I wouldn’t be able to look at him in the eyes if it came to that. Not that I can look him in the eyes know but that’s not the point here..’  _

_ Taking another breath from frustration as you run your free hand through your drying hair you started to come up with another plan to get out of this mess.  _

_ ‘Maybe I could seek out and get to my clothes he does tend to focus on his work more than the idioms around him but then again there is that off chance that he could be doing something else and...oh god no ugh..’ _

You started to play out scenarios in your head but most of them would end up with a blushing Seven seeing you naked in the hallway and you did not need that extra stress and embarrassment in your life it was already bad enough that you couldn’t talk to him without the fear of getting yelled that you didn't need the thought of him picturing you naked to add on to one of the many fears on your list. 

“Come on come on!” you proceed to look around the bathroom for anything that could help cover you up but with no success. 

“Damn it! What kind of person puts their towels somewhere else!! I mean then again what kind of person installs a bomb into their apartment...ugh there are many things wrong with this place.”

As you hunched over the bathroom sink is defeat you began to wonder if you should just get back into the shower when your eyes suddenly land on Sevens jacket that you had dragged in here with you. 

“No...Please, anything else! He was already eyeing me when I had it on before!” You felt your face suddenly become scarlet red just from the thought of his eyes on you once more.

“Damn it what did I do to get into this situation” Having no other option you defeatedly started to put on Sevens jacket. The warm and comfortable material warming up your wet body. Taking a step back so you could examine yourself in the mirror you make sure that you're completely covered up before walking over to the door. As you reach of the handle you begin to panic and wonder if you should just go back into the shower 

“God this is a stupid idea I should just...I should just go back into the shower and wait for him but...UGH screw it!” 

Turning the handle and opening the door you feel the cool air for the apartment door on your skin as you step into the hallway. 

_ 'I mean what are the chances he'll even see me I'm sure he's to busy with work to even notice me...yah!’  _ Suddenly you walk into something for being too lost in thought and almost fall backward from the force. Looking up you come face to face with Seven who looks confused for a bit until it hits him what your wearing and his face becomes scarlet red. 

“W-what are you?! Oh god… Just... JUST my jacket oh god...p-put something ON!!" Without any hesitation, you blurt out an explanation for the way you look.

“I-I I LEFT THE TOWEL A-AND AND MY CLOTHES GOT WET AND I TRY CALLING YOU BUT YOU DIDN'T ANSWER AND...AND HEY LOOK AWAY!!!!”

You could feel your face completely red and the fact that Seven eyes were wondering down your body wasn't helping at all. 

“S-Shit Just I'm...IM GOING OUT INTO THE HALLWAY!” and with that, he ran out the door and into the hallway leaving you alone and embarrassed like never before. Your mind would normally be spinning with so many questions and worries and you'd normally be panicking and start pacing back and forth mumbling to yourself on how stupid you were and how you wouldn't be able to look at his eye later but you found yourself heading over to the couch grabbing your clothes and heading back into the bathroom to change with only one thing in mind.

_ 'Seven looks pretty cute when he's flattered and blushing.’ _

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I know you must all be wondering where I've been or maybe not...but I'll answer the question anyways! Well schools been dropping essays left and right and that caused me to become burned out from writing so I took some time to come back. Don't worry I'm not dropping this story! I would also like to know would you guys want this story to go all the way to the Secret ending party one and two or have it stop at the end of Sevens route? The choices is yours people! Until next time lovely readers!

**Author's Note:**

> If you guys have any bad habits tell me! Give me ideas please


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